Small Wins & Heavy Days

 Small Wins & Heavy Days

I’m not gonna sugarcoat it—this past week has been tough. Health-wise, I’m fine. But mentally? I’ve been struggling. I’ve officially been out of work for almost three weeks now, and I haven’t left the house since June 23rd. Most of my days have been spent applying to jobs... and sleeping. It was manageable at first, but something shifted on Friday.

I had a job interview on Thursday that I thought went really well. But I haven’t heard anything back, and it’s starting to wear on me. In the past, I’ve usually been hired on the spot, so this waiting game is messing with my head.

I know I could easily get a job at a memory care facility or with a home health agency—I've done that kind of work before. But let’s be honest: my body is not made for flipping grandmas anymore. It’s back-breaking labor for way too little pay. If I’m going to break my back, I at least need to be compensated fairly.

We’re okay financially for now, so that’s not the immediate stressor. But the guilt? That’s a different story. When my kids were little, I knew staying home was the right choice. But now, without work, I just feel... lazy. Like I’m letting my family down.

Despite all that, I haven’t forgotten about my commitment to living more sustainably. It’s actually one of the few things that’s keeping me grounded right now.

This week I started replacing our plastic food storage containers with glass. It’s going to be a slow process—they’re not cheap—but it’s a start. Bonus: maybe this will stop the kids from throwing dishes into the cabinet like it’s a game of Tupperware Jenga. I swear, that cabinet has become a hazard zone. Open at your own risk.

I also swapped out our warped plastic cutting boards for new ones made of wheat straw. I haven’t used them yet, but I’m already happier knowing I don’t have to deal with the curling edges of the old ones anymore.

I’ve even been more mindful about energy use—finally turning off the bedroom fans when I leave the room. The kids used to call me out for that every time I reminded them to shut off lights. Fair is fair.

And here’s a small but satisfying victory: moving the trash can out of the kitchen actually worked! The kids now pass the recycling bin and the compost bucket before they can toss something in the trash. Turns out, just changing the setup helped shift the habit.

So yeah—emotionally, this week has been rough. But we’re still making progress, even if it’s in small, quiet ways. And for now, that’s enough.